My Team Fortress 2 unlockable ideas.

I posted this on Tom Francis’s blog just now, but figured I’d repost it here because Lord knows this place could do with some content. Basically, it’s one weapon I’d like to see for each class. I’ve tried to balance them out so they don’t become game breakers.

Scout – Roller Blades – Replaces the Pistol. Allows the Scout to move a little faster at the expense of double jumping

Soldier – Drums of the Patriots – Replaces the Shotgun. Essentially an upgrade to the Buff Banner, except it gives players around the Soldier full crits instead of mini crits. The trade off is that the Soldier himself can’t fight (he’s playing the drum), and both the duration and radius of the effect are reduced.

Pyro – Twisted Firestarter – Replaces the Flamethrower. This flamethrower has a longer range and a deadlier blast, but it’s heavier so the Pyro not only moves slower but isn’t able to strafe or turn while using it.

Demoman – Whiskey Galore! – Replaces the Grenade Launcher. A pump not to disimilar-looking to a Ghostbusters Proton pack that squirts whiskey. Upon hitting an enemy, that enemy is covered in whiskey and takes fire damage twice as quickly. Not only that but their movement becomes slower and more erratic (the effects of the alcohol) making it easier for the Demoman or teammates to hit them.

Heavy – Olga – Replaces the Minigun. Olga is a mobile gun emplacement that the Heavy can set up, dismantle and re-set up at any point. She cannot be fired during transit, and there is a short wait for assembly and disassembly. To compensate she has unlimited ammo, and the player controls her directly.

Engineer – Supply Locker – Replaces the Dispenser. The Engineer can set up a Supply Locker, like the ones in the spawn rooms, anywhere on the map. It does exactly as it does in there – instantly replenishes health and ammo. But the further away the Engineer builds it from the spawn, the longer it takes to complete – a remote-controlled helicopter has to air-lift supplies from the spawn point to the new locker, and the time it takes to make that journey (indicated by a live camera feed in the corner of the screen) is the build time. During the trip it can be taken down by enemies, but the locker itself is invincible until it arrives so the Engineer can focus on protecting the chopper.

Medic – Chloroform Cocktails – Replaces the Syringe Gun. the Medic spawns with a tank of chloroform on his back, which he uses to fill up bottles with. The bottles throw like Jarate but their effect is to completely immobilise an enemy for ten seconds – they fall to the floor, unconcious, completely open to attack. To avoid spamming, filling up the bottles takes twenty seconds.

Sniper – Crossbow – Replaces the Sniper Rifle. Same strength as the Huntsman (and same effect upon impact) but it’s more accurate and you don’t need to draw the bolt back like an arrow. The trade off is that you can’t carry as much ammo and it takes longer to reload.

Spy – Grapple Gun – Replaces the Revolver. Allows the Spy to grapple to any point within range. Cannot be used while invisible or disguised, unless disguised as an enemy Spy. can be used while carrying intelligence. If used on an enemy, the Spy flies towards them, drawing their knife on the way and delievering a facestab on arrival.

I can blog from Microsoft Word

I just proved it to you.

Friday Links 5/2/10

A collection of links to cool stuff I’ve been linked to over the past week.

Axe Cop – written by a 5-year-old, drawn by his 29-year-old professional comic artist brother. So much raw imagination and awesomeness.

Fucking hell; turns out everyone and their mother does Friday Links. I’m giving up and joining the circus.

Mega64’s first commercial for GDC 2010. The Man doesn’t like it, so they made a second. Cannot wait for the next one.

Aussie banker looks at rude pics on TV, is PWNT.

Henry Townshend is trapped in his flat. Yahtzee + Reeves + Mortimer + Silent Hill 4 = amusing for a few seconds or so.

If I hadn’t been doing my dissertation (yes, parents and Jay, I have been working), I might never have found out that Mario Party 8 got recalled because it had the word ‘Spastic’ in it. How I missed this the first time around is beyond me.

Slow news day or attempt to be more relevent? Whatever the reasoning, BBC news did a feature on Bomberman BioShock 2, and brought on as their expert a guy who dabbles in talking.

The Electronic Farmyard – A site for which someone you know might possibly be writing for in the future. HINT IT’S ME.

Bioshock 2, ruined already.

Fuck you, Game Rave's Jason Dvorak

Friday Links 29/1/10

A collection of links to cool stuff I’ve been linked to over the past week. Not a massive collection this week, but that’s life.

IGN’s list of fictional games. I’ll keep tabs even if you don’t.

Warren Ellis ripped me off even though he’s been doing it longer than me.

Valve fix a long-running Team Fortress 2 bug and make me LOL.

In the midst of all the iPad bollocks (I personally can’t see it taking off) here’s a MacForum thread from 2001 about the unveiling of the iPod. Remind me never to say something that might be wrong nine years down the line – like that bit about the iPad I just said.